Amiya and Akiya

Chapter 3

Hey what’s are some things you would recommend for relationship with trust issues.

Alright, frens let’s get into these recommendations!

Relationships are hard and they take a lot of effort to keep going, but that is the beauty of it all. Choosing one another and sticking by each other’s side no matter what.

We have a few options for you when dealing with someone who has trust issues. But first we have to get deeper into the problem and help you understand why your partner has trust issues.

When someone has trust issues, it can be due to a number of things. The past has a big impact on how your partner acts and carries themselves. If your partner has had a past of being in relationships and they are toxic and harmful, he will shield up.

He will shield up and not trust you because he has been hurt very badly in the past. So don’t think he has trust issues because of what you are doing; you have nothing to do with his trust. It is from his past.

His trust issue could also be formed by his friends and family or anyone that broke that trust between him and whoever it was.

Now that you know it has nothing to do with you, lets get into the recommendations.

1. Talk to him

I know this sounds super cringy and lame; you may have already tried this. But I want you to try it again. When you talk to your partner, we want you to really show that you care about their past and them as a person.

Sit with your partner and really have a heartfelt conversation. Give them your full attention and tell them that you are here for them. You can try to talk about their past and get information on what event caused them to have these trust issues come about.

Some people are uncomfortable with vulnerability, so you can try to show them your vulnerable side. Really try to connect with your partner and tell them that you want to build trust because you are not a threat. Tell them that you want to be someone they can trust.

That you want to be the one they come to when they are feeling down. When they are having a problem, you want to be the person they can lean on.

You can also ask them what you can do as a partner to build their trust with you. Let them know with all your heart that you want to be the person they can trust.

2. Go slow

Trust is not something that happens overnight; it takes time to build a strong foundation of trust with your partner. When you are trying to get your partner to trust you, it cannot be rushed.

You cannot get frustrated when they don’t show signs at first with not opening up. Understand that you are building something together, and if you want it to be strong and last, you have to take it slow and put the time into it.

You may not want to hear it but your partner may not open up until a very long time. And this is ok as long as you are dedicated to how you feel about them. Being slow and consistent with how you want them to trust you will work. So never give up hope you will get there; it will just take time. Never rush someone to trust you; let them take their time until they feel comfortable.

3. Be consistent.

We are not sure what type of personality your partner has but being consistent in being the person they can trust will help a lot.

Showing consistency in honesty, open communication, and just showing up as a partner.

When they make a promise with you, always commit to it and follow through. Show how you will always be there when they need help; if they need to let something off their chest, be there and allow them to do that.

Vulnerability can be difficult for you as well but if you show your partner a deeper side of you, they will soon be able to show you a deeper side of them because they know you are not a threat.

We want to stress to you that this takes a lot of time. We do not know how badly your partner has been hurt. Nor do we know how deep his trust issues run. But we want to help you get to being the person your partner can 100% trust.

4. Is he worth the wait?

Fren, we always want to make sure that you have all the options and have a clear view of everything. We are not the type of people to sugarcoat anything; we are going to keep it 100% real with you no matter what.

Think about it: is he really the one? Can you see yourself married to this guy and is he the person that you are willing to spend the rest of your life with?

Most people will say yes because that is what you are supposed to say, right? But before you put all your time into this person, before you put months or even years into trying to build real authentic trust with this person. Is he the one?

It’s ok if the answer is no; you always want to be true to yourself.

Is their character marriage material? How do they treat you? How do they treat others? What are their career goals? Will they be able to provide for you later in life if you have a family? What is their relationship with their family like? What are their beliefs and values?

We want you to gather all this information about this person before you put your time into trying to gain all their trust. We want you to be with the right person who is well-rounded. Never pick a person for their looks; pick them because of their heart and what they can offer you.

Really think about these questions and if they match everything you want in a partner. You can most definitely be in it for the long haul because you know they will not be going anywhere. You guys will be there for each other and never leave each other’s side.

Best of luck, fren, and we hope you two can build a stronger trust together!